"The peace I feel now gives me the motivation to stay in recovery"

Former fellow Selina knows better than anyone how it feels when social media takes over your life. During her treatment at Yes We Can, she found the strength to break free from her addiction, her depression and the constant feeling of never being good enough.

“Before Yes We Can, I was very depressed and isolated myself. I was on my phone all the time, always with my headphones on. Whenever my parents asked me something, I would immediately get angry. Because of that, they started walking on eggshells around me and didn’t dare to make contact anymore. They did everything they could to avoid escalation. I spent most of my time at home and stopped meeting up with my friends. I always came up with excuses not to go , I never told them the truth. Because I was constantly on social media, my world became very small. At some point, I also started self-harming, which eventually led to several suicide attempts. My life wasn’t a happy one.”

Selina had been struggling for quite some time. At school, she was heavily bullied because of her physical disability. Her journey towards recovery began in a place where she finally felt truly seen: Yes We Can. "With previous care providers, I lied to everyone. No one really knew how bad things were for me. At Yes We Can, I was confronted with reality for the first time. I already knew my social media use was a problem, but in the clinic I realised just how serious it had become.”

Escaping into a digital bubble

"Social media was my escape, my own bubble where I didn’t have to feel anything. Where others might use alcohol or drugs to relax, I would scroll for hours on end. It made me incredibly insecure. On TikTok, I’d see girls who I thought were much prettier than me, all because of my low self-esteem. If they wore certain clothes or used certain makeup, I would rush out to buy the same. I did everything I could to fit in, because I was so unsure of myself. Social media influenced me so much that it became completely unhealthy."

From surviving to living

"After my time at Yes We Can, I feel so much better in myself. I’ve started to enjoy things again, I no longer have social media, and I compare myself to others far less. As a result, my insecurities have really diminished. I no longer feel the need to fit in everywhere and live much more in the moment. The peace I experience now gives me the motivation to stay in recovery. I truly never want to go back to how I felt then, that thought keeps me grounded."

Selina consciously chooses not to download the apps again. "Sometimes it is challenging without social media. When I’m out with my friends, I often see people around me quickly checking Instagram or TikTok on their phones. In those moments, I do find it difficult, because the apps are right there in front of you. But at the same time, I notice how much I’m genuinely enjoying the moment. It really makes me realise how many people have no idea just how addictive social media can be."

Setting boundaries and standing up for yourself

"What had the biggest impact on me during my treatment at Yes We Can were the themed sessions. Learning to set boundaries was a topic that came up time and time again. For example, during group sessions, I would often be skipped over during check-ins, and I didn’t understand why. Eventually, I had to figure out for myself that I needed to speak up. That’s when it hit me. I had never done that in my entire life. I never stood up for myself and just let things happen. Even during other activities, asking for help and standing up for myself became key focus points for me. I also realised how strong my need to prove myself has always been. I constantly wanted to show that I could succeed, despite my disability. Thanks to Yes We Can, I now know how to set my boundaries."

Alongside working incredibly hard on herself, Selina also experienced many beautiful moments in the clinic. "My favourite moment at Yes We Can was the Wednesday evening campfire, where we would welcome the new fellows. For me, it was a warm, comforting moment where we’d all dance together. It really gave me a sense of freedom. I also spent the holidays in the clinic, which is still a very special memory I’m incredibly grateful for. We had so much fun and did so many lovely things. I still look back on that time with really fond feelings."

Motivation for others

By now, Selina knows better than anyone how important it is to be honest about your feelings and to dare to ask for help. Something she avoided for a long time but now sees as a true strength. "What would I like to say to other fellows in the same situation? Talk about your problems. I always kept everything to myself, but that doesn’t work. Just let it out, talk to someone about it. In the end, you’ll get through it so much better together." She also has a message for her younger self: "Be kinder to yourself. Don’t be so hard on yourself and don’t set the bar so high." A message Selina believes applies to anyone struggling: you are good enough, just as you are, even when things feel tough.